Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
