Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Farmville is her only friend.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
What a dumb baby whore.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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