I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
