Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize