I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
