I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
My sheets look like a crime scene.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
