how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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