I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
