Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
