these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize