Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
