Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Are we still banned from the library?
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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