He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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