I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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