discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
