We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
