It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
two words: eviction party
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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