So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
