??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
