Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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