It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
