there was a trapeze. enough said
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
