We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
