@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
