Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
