Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
