I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
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