you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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