Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
MIDGETS
????
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
