Screwed.edu
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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