And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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