Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
