Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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