Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
