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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom

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• (813): View more from Florida

  I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.

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• (212): View more from New York

  yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.

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• (713): View more from Texas

  do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break

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• (949): View more from California

  When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.

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• (631): View more from New York

  I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry

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