Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
