i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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