**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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