But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
