I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize