You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
