I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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