i think my mom watched the whole time
I don't think brook has ever known best
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
