It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize