that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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