i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
My pussy is not your playground.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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