Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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