Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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