Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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