fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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