So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize